Monday, 31 March 2014

UNICEF Tap Project

How long can you go without your phone? 10 minutes? Prove it and help save a life at the same time!

According to UNICEF, 768 million people lack access to safe, clean drinking water, 2.5 billion people live without proper sanitation and 1,400 children die every day from diseases linked directly to unsafe water and lack of basic sanitation.

Millions of children lack clean water. How long can you go without something far less vital... like your phone?

Together, UNICEF and clothing designer Giorgio Armani are running a website called UNICEF Tap Project. Visit the homepage (Google UNICEF Tap Project) in the browser of your phone and get started. For every 10 minutes you can go without your phone, 1 day of clean water will be donated to children in need.


I think we can all agree that people today, especially young people, spend far too much time on their phones. How often have you gone to pre drinks or a party or just to the pub or what ever and realised after a while that nobody's saying anything because you're all on your phone, tweeting, instagramming or updating your facebook status about what a great time you're having? We've all been there.

Lets be honest, do you really need your phone as much as you use it? No matter what your answer to that question is, I think it's safe to say that you don't need it as much as dying children need clean water. So try it out, if you can't go for more then 10 minutes, then at least you've helped donate 1 day of clean water to a child in need and, you never know, maybe it'll help you see that you're just a tad more attached to your phone than what's healthy for you?


Saturday, 29 March 2014

home sickness or not home sickness - that's the question!

Do I want to go home? Yes. Do I want to go home? No. I don't know, at the moment. Not that it really matters, I'm going home anyway, but I thought I'd write my thoughts down to figure out what I'm actually dealing with, since that was the original reason why I started the blog.

Going home - pros 

Seeing my family. If there's anyone who's been following the blog for a while, you'll know that my mum came to visit in february to give me the heart medication prescribed by my GP back home, so it hasn't really been that long since I saw her, but I really miss my brother! We have a good relationship, by my opinion anyway, and I miss hanging out with him. Not that I don't miss my mum, obviously I do, but you get my point. I am quite sad my dad won't be home, though.


Going to Spain. I'm going to Playa del Ingles, Spain with my mum and brother and I can't wait! I think it'll do me good to have a whole week without anything to worry about exept which book to bring to the beach. I'm going to leave electronics and so on at home and just relax. Do nothing, just recharge my batteries and chill out with two of my favourite people. Don't worry though, I'll probably bring the tab2 to take pictures and post on the blog. Besides, I'm not posting every day anyway, so you're used to it, haha! 



Work. I'll get to go to work again, which I actually look forward to! I can't wait to do night shifts and talk to people I haven't seen in three months. I'm looking forward to thepub being packed with people and feeling the stress of the beer taps running empty, trying to keep up with the line of people. I don't know what it is, but I love it.



Friends. I'm going to Oslo before going home. In Oslo I'll be staying with Kristine, the girl who came to visit a while ago. We're going to a concert with our favourite band and it'll be a great weekend. I'm looking forward to good food, some wine and discussing world problems like only we can. 

 


Doctor's appointment. I have an appointment with my GP and I'm looking forward to being able to ask my doctor the questions I have about my heart condition and get the info I feel like I need to maybe get my drivers license back a bit early.

Free food. I'm not saying I'm completely broke, because I'm not, but being a responsible adult who pays for her own food and rent and everything is fucking expensive to put it mildly. I've always hear grown ups saying stuff like "god, not again, the price for cheese has got up 30p..." and I've always thought they've been over reacting, but to all you lucky bastards who still live like kings at home with your parents without a care in the world: growing up isn't as great as you think it is. Sure, you get loads of freedom and independence, but the more freedom you get, the more responsibilities you get, so don't think living away from home is a breeze!
My mum's aunt's necklace. I know this might be a silly reason, but my mum's aunt became a sort of proxy-nan for me and my brother when our last grandparent died almost 11 years ago and she ment the world to me. When she died as well, I inherited a necklace she used to wear and I forgot it at home when I want back to England after christmas and I really miss it. I guess you could say that this is proof that family is really, really important to me, but I don't see that as a bad thing. 



Going home - cons

I can't drive. I won't elaborate too much on this point, since I know I keep nagging about this. However, I doubt anyone understands just how much driving means to me. I'm dreading the feeling of being stuck in that tiny little place, not even being able to get to work on my own.


Dad's not home. I haven't seen my dad since I drove him to the boat on the 2nd of January and, being a daddy's girl, I really miss him. I've been trying to email him, but since the new boat he's on doesn't have a very good wifi set up and calling over the satelite phone is really expensive, I haven't talked to him for a while. I feel like I miss him more now that I'm not home, because when I lived with my parents I always saw him until he went away and were always home the day he came back, but it's not like taht anymore and 5 months can easily pass without me seeing my dad and that makes me sad. 


All in all, I am looking forward to going home. I've been sat here for half an hour trying to think of more cons to going home, but I can't think of any. I have to say, the fact that I can't drive probably counts for 3, but I'm still looking forward to Norway, speaking Norwegian, eating Norwegian, seeing my family and going on holiday and all the other stuff. 

I love when I do stuff like this and it turns out I don't really have that much to complain about. After all, there are a lot of people that have is a lot worse than me. I'm lucky, really. 

Thursday, 27 March 2014

North Korea cofirms it has landed a man on the sun.

No, I'm not kidding. I mean, obviously, they haven't actually landed a man on the sun, but it seems they are trying to get people to think that they have. Actually, I'm not too sure about that one either.. The sources reporting this doesn't exactly seem to be the most reliable ones.

Anyway, there are a few things about the case.

  1. The "astronaut" is supposed to be Kim Jong-Un's 17 year old nephew.
  2. He's supposed to have gone to the sun and back in about 18 hours.
  3. He went at night to be protected agains the heat.
  4. He brought back samples from the sun to give to his uncle.
    Fun fact: did you know that if you took a sample of the suns mass the size of the head of a pin, it would kill everyone in a 1,000 mile radius?

It's obviously bullshit. The sources are hardly reliable and I have a hard time wrapping my head around the thought that North Korea would think that the rest of the world is that stupid. Gave me a good laugh though!

Sources:

http://www.tweaktown.com/news/35032/north-korea-confirms-it-has-landed-a-man-on-the-sun/index.html

http://smug.no/post.aspx?ID=13851

Wednesday, 26 March 2014

First run in months!

I know people who constantly brag about their workouts online are annoying and shouldn't be allowed to have wifi, but I haven't been for a run in months, so I feel like I have an ever so tiny right to brag at the moment. It's 2.30 am and I just got in the  door, sweating and panting. I've been out for half an hour and my legs feel like they're made of led, but it's a good feeling. I mean, a 30 minute run at 2am is better than no run, right? I think so. I know 30 minutes isn't that long, but if I can get out and jog about 3 times a week, it should improve slowly but steadily. I also think that if I go all in and try to work out every single day, I'll get tired of it and quit. However, if I take it slowly, it'll become a habit and a lot easier to keep to. Everything in moderation, right!

Hopefully, I'll be able to work out at the gym where my mum works when I get home for easter and I'm thinking about getting a membership at my old gym for summer holiday. They do group workouts that are really good for your whole body and I kind of miss that! I honestly don't think I've ever been so out of shape as I am now, so it's really time to get my ass off the bed and start doing something. The ones who followed my blog at the beginning, will perhaps remember that I did a 30 day challenge. Well, that went south. I kept going until Kristine came to visit and then I forgot about the whole thing. Hopefully, I'll keep going the way I have for the past week with less sugar and soda, more water and a bit of exercise every now and again, and my summer body should be fit and trained for 2054 (not setting too high hopes for myself, haha)!

One reason why I'm looking forward to going home is that food is expensive. And I don't mean annoyingly expensive like diesel is, but fucking EXPENSIVE! I've always heard grown-ups complain about it (I don't count myself as one yet, no), but I would have never thought that food was this expensive until I actually moved out. However, what I'm really, really looking forward to is fish. My dad works at a fishing boat, as I'm sure I've mentioned before, and we get all the fish we need and more, for free and I can't wait to have a proper fish meal!

Maybe it's time to go to sleep now? Me and Liva are going into town tomorrow and then going to the library. Again. It'll be the 6th time in a row, but I think we're getting close to the end of our workload now. I have about 800 words left on the essay that I'm working on and then I have another one at 2000 words that seems like quite an easy one, and then it's easter! I don't know if I've mentioned this on the blog before, but I'm going to Spain with my mum and brother during easter, so I'll hopefully be nice and tan when I get back!

Definitely time to go to sleep now. Hoping I won't be too stiff and sore tomorrow!

Sunday, 23 March 2014

Bo Burnham - From Gods perspective

Books that you think I wrote are way too thick
Who needs a thousand metafores to figure out you shouldn't be a dick
And I don't watch you when you sleep
Surprisingly I don't use my omnipotence to be a fucking creep

You're not going to heaven
Why the fuck would you think I'd ever kick it with you?
None of you are going to heaven
There's a trillion aliens cooler than you

You shouldn't obstain from rape just 'cause you think that I want you to.
You shouldn't rape 'cause rape is a fucked up thing to do.
Pretty obvious, just don't fucking rape people
Didn't think I'd have to write that one down for you.

I don't think masturbation is obsene
It's absolutely natural and the weirdest fucking thing I've ever seen
You make my job a living hell
I sent gays to fix overpopulation
Boy did that go well

You're not going to heaven
Eat a thousand crackers, sing a million hymns
None of you are going to heaven
You're not my children, you're a bad game of Sims.

You shouldn't obstain from pork just 'cause you think that I want you to.
You can eat pork because why the fuck would I give a shit?
I created the universe, think I'm drawing the line at the fucking deli aisle?

You argue and you bicker and you fight
Atheists and catholics, jew and hindus argue day and night
Over what they think they think is true
But no one entertains the thought that maybe God does not believe in you

You pray so badly for heaven
Knowing any day might be the day that you die
But maybe life on earth could be heaven
Doens't just the thought of it make it worth a try?

My love's the type of the thing that you have to earn
And when you earn it, you don't need it
My love's the type of the thing that you have to earn
And when you earn it, you don't need it

I'm not gonna give you love just 'cause I know that you want me to
If you want love then the love has gotta come from you

Link to the song

I love this song. This is exactly the view I have of religion. Don't get me wrong, if you believe in what ever religion it might be, that's good for you, but religion is not for me.

The problem I have with religion (read: christianity) is

1. some people follow the bible like slaves (pun intended). God did NOT write the bible and over the last 2000 years, the church has altered the bible to make more money off it. How is that acceptable? How can you follow something like that to the letter? There's some good things in the bible, I'll give it that, like the 10 commandments and so on, but it's as Bo says in the song: Who needs a thousand metafores to figure out you shouldn't be a dick?

2. Somewhere in the bible, it says that "you shouldn't lie with a man like you would lie with a woman." A lot of christians has taken this and ran with it. One great example is the Westboro Baptist Church. They run the website called GodHatesFags.com. From a few simple sentences in the bible, this lot has decided to take it upon themselves to protest agains homosexuality as if it were a choice that people made.

3. The day catholic priests start practice what they preach and stop raping young children, I'll concider taking religion a tad more seriously.

Back to the song!

I love how Bo brings up rape culture, LGBT-rights, masturbation taboo, war and the notion that pork are sacred meat, all in a three minute song! I love how he finishes the song by saying that if you want to be loved, you have to love. Nothing is free, you have to give to recieve. This guy is a genious, it's as simple as that.

I know some people has said that he uses homophobia and racism to make humor, but I think that if you have some humor yourself, you'll be able to understand what he's saying without being offended. Don't get me wrong, I'm no fan of either homophobia or racism, but I think that even if you are a member of the BAME-community or the LGBT-community or both, you should at least have a tiny bit of humor about it. I'm not saying you should take all kinds of crap concerning your identity, but being able to laugh and make jokes makes life a bit easier.

Anyway, have a listen to the song, it's absolutely golden and definitely worth your time!

Friday, 21 March 2014

Lecture, volunteering, town, monopoly, course change.

Hey!

It's been a long day. Not long as in tiring, but long as in I've had a lot of things to do.

First of all I went to my Introduction to Criminology 2 lecture, which was really good today. We had a guest lecturer that talked about homophobia and how badly the LGBT-community are treated by some people. The guest lecturer were a gay man that works with a programme that gives young people in the LGBT-community the chance to get together in a totally homophobia-free environment, where they can be themselves and get the help and support they need to do whatever they might feel like they need to do, whether it's coming out to friends and family or dealing with homophobic behaviour, whatever it might be. They also help people that has been subjected to hate crimes because of their sexual orientation to report this to the police. The amount of hate crimes that go unreported are ridiculously high, so I think it's brilliant that you can go to this programme to get help and support if you think that reporting such incidents on your own is too difficult.

I think LGBT-rights are an important issue to raise. In the developed world of 2014, are we really that uneducated that we can't see each other for what we are, human beings? If you're straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, asexual, pansexual, whatever, you should be able to live your life in a completely normal manner without having to deal with homophobic pricks who think they're just that much better than everyone else. Because I can pretty much guarantee, that the same mens men, the same jocks, the same idiots that go around spreading homophobic bullshit are the same guys who sit at home in their bed at night, watching lesbian porn while jerking off. Tell me I'm wrong, I dare you.

this is why I've decided to start volunteering for this programme that I can not for the life of me remember the name of. This is something I truly care about and it's something that's really important to do something about, so why shouldn't I? At some point during our bachelor degree, we are urged to do volunteer work any way beacuse it looks really good on the CV, so I think that I've hit the jackspot with this!

That was my rant of the day, haha! After the lecture was over, I went into town with Liva to get some stuff. Now I have enough food to last me the rest of the semester and whatever might be left on the 4th of April will be put in the freezer until I return in May. I might actually have bought enough food to not have to buy any in may, but that's probably just as well.

When I came home and had put all my stuff away, I just hung out in my room for a while. I'm one of those people that really need some quiet alone time and I think making sure that I get that hour to myself to do nothing each day is really important. I feel like if I take some time to myself then I'm not that stressed. This might be logical to everyone else, but I've never realised until now that if I get in that one hour each day of just total relaxation, then I can go on like usual the rest of the day. I can stay a yes person if I get in that one hour, and I like being a yes person, I like making people happy, I like helping out and I like the fact that people seem to think that they can come to me if they need something. If one Hannah-hour each day can let me stay that way without my heart deciding that it's suddenly had enough, then that's what I'll do. I mean, I've always enjoyed being alone and I've always made the time to be alone, but I've always done something while alone. I've worked on whatever people have needed me to do. I've kept my phone on in case anyone needs me. I don't do that anymore. Hannah-hour means nobody else but me and it's made a huge difference. I know it sound really cheesy and really lame, but as long as it works, I don't really give a shit.

By the way, I do apologise for the language on this blog. At first I never thought that I would swear in these posts, but then I realised that it's part of who I am, so why not. I'll have a description put in at the top right corner, saying that the blog is rated for language or something, just to be politically correct, though. At some point. (maybe).

After spending some time alone with my thoughts, Sharleen and I went over to flat 28 to play Monopoly with Rhys, Liam, Hannah S and Nye, who we're living with next year. It was the first ever Sparkford Close 20A get together and it was a lot of fun. I think I'm going to enjoy next year a lot!

I also got an email today, saying that I am more than welcome to transfer into the first year of Forensic Studies in September. All I need now is to get the paperwork signed and I'll officially (almost) be a Forensic student! I actually can't wait to get my hands on the case files and equipment that the Forensic people get to use. They actually study real case files with real crime scene photos of real dead people and if that's not freaking awesome, then I don't know what is! I'm really glad I made the choice of changing courses, I think it'll serve me in the long run, even though I have sort of wasted a year doing Criminology. However, it's not completely wasted, I'll still be able to put it on my CV and I'll have somewhat of a unique education when I'm finished, so that's good at least!

 It's now a 3.15am and I have a ton of stuff to get done tomorrow, so I'm going to get to bed! Hope you've all had a good day!

Wednesday, 19 March 2014

Cyber Italia - again

Heyo!

I'm in Cyber Italia. Again. I've been putting together what was supposed to be a short plan showing what I intend to do in the last assignment for Portrayals of Crime and Deviance. I've now got about 800 words. I did say short, right? Well..

The plan is to compare Dexter to CSI Miami with focus on how they are relative to the time they are set in. I chose those two because they are set in the same city, making them a bit easier to compare, and because they are so completely different. While Dexter is fairly relateable, CSI Miami is a whole mixture of stuff that's not relative to anything. In CSI Miami, DNA sequenses from blood samples take 30 seconds to complete, while in Dexter, the centrifuging stage alone take 12 hours. Also, in Dexter, while not entirely realistic, the crew take a lot more precautions not to contaminate the crime scene they are working, by wearing protective clothing. In CSI, blood, tissue and hair samples are handled by people in fancy dresses and high heels and I cannot begin to descibe how much that annoys me. The whole show is really just a stupefied parody on the truth of forensic work and don't even get me started on Horatio Crane and his damned sun glasses at the end of each episode.. If they find a dead prostitute with her arms and legs cut off, he has no ethic issue what so ever with taking off his bloody sun glasses while saying "I guess that's the last time she charged an arm and a leg for the service". I mean, come on, how about showing some respect for the dead, huh?

Anyway. I feel like I use that word a lot. Anyway. It feels weird to start a new section on a completely different subject without something to tie it together, do you know what I mean?

Anyway. The weather's been really nice lately. I've actually only wore dresses and skirts for the past week, it's amazing! Yesterday and today it hasn't been as great as last week though, but at least it hasn't been raining. I also rediscovered a skirt I thought I'd forgot in Norway, so I've been wearing that today. It's a dark grey maxi skirt and I've been passing time by ripping out all my tops from my dresser, trying to find out how many different variations of outfits I have now that I know where the skirt is! I have another one in black, so maybe I'll leave the tomboy look behind for a while and go for a relaxed maxi skirt and converse look for a while? I'm especially looking forward to wearing it in Spain in april, with just a bikini top and a loose singlet, great outfit for hot days!

Right, that got very girly very fast. I'm not that girly, really, so I've got to recuperate now.

Earlier today I played Monopoly with Haroon, Sharleen, Andrew (Sharleens boyfriend) and Rhys (one of my flatmates next year). It was really fun! I love playing Monopoly, but I have no economic sence what so ever, so I find it hard to know what's a good deal and what's not and that's a bit of a problem when playing Monopoly. the only time I've ever won in that game was when playing alone with Sharleen last week, but according to herself, she's shit at it as well, so that might not have been that much of an accomplishment, haha! Me, rhys and Sharleen are living together next year along with Liam and Hannah, from WD28, where Rhys lives now, and Nye, a guy that Liam knows from the Rugby team. Sharleen got Monopoly for her birthday this year, so I'm seeing some flat feuds over silly games in my future.

Talking about my future, I (think) I've gotten a bit further with changing course for next year. The faculty leader told me to email the programme leader for forensics to ask if there were actually room for me in the class for next year, so I've done that, hopefully he'll respond tomorrow and I can get the paper work sorted and I'll officially (almost) be a forensics student!
The faculty leader also sent me the list of next years modules, so if I do get in, this is what my year looks like from September:

Semester 1:
Introduction to Forensic Studies
Academic and Employment Skills
History of Forensic Studies
Introduction to Criminology 1
Semester 2:
Trace Evicende
Forensic Biology
Police and Police Work
Key Thinkers and Themes in Conceptualising Crime

I've already had Intro to Crim1, Police and Police Work and Key thinkers and Themes in conceptualising Crime as well as a module similar to the Academic and Employment skills module, so I might not have to do those again, which would make my year next year almost too easy. Two modules each week, four assignments each semester at the most, it would be heaven! However, it would make the transition into second year that much harder, so that's going to be a challenge, but I'll get to that when I get there, no need to worry about that yet!

I should probably get back to writing now. I think I'm mostly done with the plan for the PoC&D module, so I'll email that to the module leader and then I'll have to get started on the 2000 word essay due monday for the Police and Police work module. The assignment is to "Debate the notion that in the modern era the police force must be armed to ensure local and national security," and that's something that I actually know a thing or two about, since we've discussed it a bit in previous school years. I also have an advantage, since I have information not only on how things are done in the UK, but I can also compare them to how things are done in Norway and then talk about which method works best, so I think it'll be a good essay!

Hope you all have had a good day! :)

Monday, 17 March 2014

next summer

Hi! 

So, I've been thinking about something. This summer I obviously can't do that much since I can't drive. Sure, I could buy a plane ticket and get where I want to be at a fraction of the time, but there's something about driving for hours and hours, listening to loud music and singing at the top of my voice (if I'm alone that is) that just makes me feel free. I know that sounds like a load of hippie crap, but I don't care, I love it. Therefore, I've planned what I'm going to do next summer. When I finally get my beloved drivers license back, I'm going to work my ass off for a month or two so that I can actually pay for it, and then I'm borrowing my mums car and driving anywhere. I'll make a kick ass playlist with all the best songs and I won't book a single hotel room, I'm just going to drive. Maybe north, maybe south, who knows. Maybe I'll go to sweeden, maybe I won't, I haven't planned anything, and I'm not going to. I'm just going to get in the car and drive, all alone, to anywhere. I actually can't wait. 

It will be absolutely glorious. I'll be done with first year BA forensic science, I'll be back in Norway, the sun will (hopefully) be shining and I can picture it already. The luxurious dark green Vauxhall Astra, my blue white and black dress, sun glasses and the playlist from heaven. It'll be amazing! I've actually got myself so worked up about this that I might just steal a car and go right now. 

Right, enough about my futuristic lonesome roadtrip. What have I done today? Nothing. I've watched a season of Dexter, half the second Harry Potter film and eat my weight in skittles. Well, not really, I've had half a bag of skittles, but now my tummy hurts from all the skittles, so it feels like I've eat my weight in skittles, ya feel me? Haha. To be honest, I've been singing a lot. Both Haroon and Sharleen are at home in south London or Reading, and since they are the ones in the rooms next to mine, I can sing (almost) as loud as I like and I love that! Right now it's Avril Lavigne - When you're gone. I have this playlist on spotify with loads of crap that I used to listen to when I was younger, and Avril was a total favourite when I was 10-11! 

I've been talking a bit with my brother lately. Last semester we didn't really talk much, but this semester has been different. He's the most fantastic little guy and I really miss him when I'm in England. However, I'm hoping that he'll be able to come visit me some time next semester, which would be great! Not sure if I'm more scared of him meeting my friends and realize that I'm the weird one in the gang or them meeting him and realizing that they socialize with the wrong sibling, though. Because he is really cool. He's too smart for anyone's good and he's quite cute. Guess he got the jack pot of the gene pool.

Now, time for bed! Lecture at 9AM tomorrow, police and police work! Should be fun. 

Good night! 

Friday, 14 March 2014

My best friend, cancer and my thoughts.

I don't know if it's my place to be writing this, since I'm not the one who's sick and I hope that everyone understands that I'm not writing this to gain any form of attention from her situation what so ever, I'm simply trying to vent. To let out some of the steam that's building up in my head, and to put my worst fears at the moment into words in the hope that by doing so, it'll be easier to handle. If you read this, Camilla, and there's something I get wrong, then please correct me. If you want me to take it down, I will.

Camilla and I went to school together for a year in 2010/2011. When we started our second year of common studies, she started a chef's line at another school so I obviously didn't see her that much. You'd think that in that situation, you would sort of drift apart and eventually stop speaking to each other. Well, I guess we sort of did for a while. We had contact on a regular basis, but more once a month that every day like we used to. Still, Camilla remained one of my best friends, one of the ones that I really felt like I could tell anything to. That's the communication we've had for the past three years. Some periods we've talked more than others, but no matter how long it was since we talked, we could always message each other if there was something we needed, or just wanted, to talk about, and the other one would be there.

When I decided to move to England, I'll admit that I half expected to lose contact with most, if not all, of my old friends and I am sorry to say that I though Camilla might be one of the ones that I would lose contact with, since we hadn't seen each other that much lately and we were having one of those periods where we didn't talk as much. However, when I moved, I realised that when everyone else was starting to grow tired of me only talking about England and my friends and activities over here, she was always ready to listen. We started skyping. Usually once a week, once every two weeks at the least and I am so grateful for those conversations. Camilla is one of those that when you're talking about issues you're having with people she doesn't even know, she will still listen and then try to contribute with her thoughts and opinions instead of saying things like "oh, that sucks" and "I don't know, really" and I love her so increadibly much for that.

When I was going back for christmas, I knew that she had been to see a gynecologist. She then messaged me while I was in Reading visiting Sharleen, saying that she had got the results back from the gynecologist, and they had informed her that she had cancer. a 9*8cm (roughly 3*3inches) tumor was blocking the left side of her uterus from the back. She was scheduled for surgery in Trondheim about 10 days later, as I recall it. The operation went well, they removed the tumor and a whole lot of other stuff that I can't remember what was at the moment and sent it for testing to see if it was benign or malignant. The test results came back and the tumor was malignant. Cancerous. Dangerous. Scary. Chemo therapy.

On monday this week she had a CT-scan. The gynecologist had found a new mass at 5*6 cm (roughly 2*2 inches) that he/she didn't know what was. It could be blood or other fluid from the operation or it could be another tumor, which would mean that the chemo wasn't working properly. The CT-scan showed that there were cancerous cells, but she was reassured that the chemo should kick it's ass.

On tuesday, she had her third round of chemo therapy and was half way through that hell (yay!). I talked to her for a while as she was getting the chemo therapy and she seemed to be in good spirit, since the chemo should remove the new cancer cells as well as the old ones.

However, today I got a message from her saying that Trondheim had called, saying they wanted her back up there as quickly as possible to do more tests because they were quite alarmed that there were new findings of cancerous cells. I can not begin to describe how scared that made me. Obviously, when talking about cancer, it can go either way, you either beat it or you don't. Now, Camilla is one of the strongest people I know and I know that she can handle just about anything, but even the strongest person in the world has their limit and that's what scares me. What if this is her limit? What are they going to find on the new scans and tests? Is my best friend going to be here next year? I don't know and not knowing scares the shit out of me.

I know that if I had chosen to go to uni in Norway, I wouldn't feel any better than I do now. I still wouldn't have been able to do anything for her, but at least I could be there, physically, once in a while, to hold her hand and talk and let her know that I was really there. Because I don't feel like I am. I mean, we talk almost every day and I try to talk to her about it, ask her how she's doing and what she's thinking to let her know that she can talk to me if she wants to and if she needs to. Also, she has said on her own blog that she want's people to call it what it is. Cancer. She want's people not to beat around the bush about it, because that won't make it any better. She has cancer and that's just how it is. So I try to do that when we talk about it. I try to take everything she has told me about it into concideration every time we talk about it to let her know that I care. That I remember what she told me last week and that I listen. I don't just hear, I listen. Because I think I would appretiate that if I was in her situation, but then again I don't know because I've never had cancer. But as I said, I'm trying as best as I can to show her that I'm here for her in every way and still I feel like I'm not.

What I'm trying to say is that I'm dead scared that she won't make it. I know I should be thinking positively and I shouldn't make up this scenario in my head where I need to buy plane tickets in all haste to go home and say goodbye to one of my bestest best friends in the whole wide world, but when someone who means that much to you has to face something as fucking awful as cancer at 19, you can't help it! I know I probably over react, that she probably will be fine. Still, I can't keep my head from spinning and I can't keep from crying when I think about it.

What makes this all so hard, for me that is, is that I'm so bloody far away. Every time she's told me that she has bad news, this tiny little voice has crept up in the back of my head saying "why the fuck did you move so far away?" and that voice keeps getting stronger. Don't get me wrong, I love that I took the step of moving to England all by my self and I would probably do it again, given the option, but as the situation is, I regret it just a tiny bit. I feel like there's nothing I can do. I know there's nothing I could have done anyway, but being so far away from it all certainly doesn't help.

There is no limit to what I would give for her to be healthy as a horse right this instant. I would sell my sole to the devil and all his demons for her to get well. I love this girl so unbelievably much because we have this friendship where no matter how long it's been since we last talked, we both know that nothing is wrong and that we can pick up where we left off without any awkwardness what so ever and I've never had that before.


I love you to the moon and back, babe. When I come home, we'll put sticker stars on our faces again and we'll have a laugh and take selfies like we used to.

If there is a God, then can you please do something? If you exist and you did put us all here, can you please let Camilla stay until we're old and grey and have 15 grandkids each and we're sitting in a nursing home comparing battle wounds? Can you please let this magnificent ray of sun shine stay on this earth to live a full life? Can you please make sure that she will be able to have children when this nightmare is over? Can you please just make my best friend well? I need her, don't take her away from me.

Wednesday, 12 March 2014

Target's photoshopped bikini models

EDIT: I have no clue what happened with the background colour on the text further down and I can't figure out how to change it.. Hope you'll all forgive my horrible computer skills!


Has anyone seen what Kjendis, the Huffington Post or the New York Daily News has written about Target's new bikini models? Well I have. Take a look at these pictures.


What the hell happened to her left arm? Who in their right mind photoshopped one of this girls arms to be longer than the other and decided that it looked good? 

The girl has got a spike in her armpit and on her hip! Seriously, if you're going to release a photoshopped ad for bikinis, at least photoshop it to look realistic! And that thigh gap? Thigh gaps are ridiculous as is, but this poor girl looks like she's had her lady parts cut out with scissors.. Honestly, I can't see what purpose this is supposed to serve. What on earth could be so wrong with this model that caused the advert agency to decide that she looked better without a crotch? 

What annoys me so incredibly about this advert (apart from the ridiculoussly bad photoshopping skills of the poor graphic design intern assigned this job) is that the "Xhilaration® Junior's Midkini 2-Piece Swimsuit -Leopard Print" is part of Target's JUNIOR line. In other words, it's for children. Let's be honest, aren't there enough young girls with eating disorders from having their minds twisted by media and marketing as is, without them having to see this as well? Do we really need to photoshop young girls? When are we going to start photoshopping babies for adverts? Or are we already doing that? When I some day have children and look in catalogs to find new clothes for them, will I see a 10 month old child with a thigh gap and a sexy pose? I really hope not.

When we're on the subject of me raising children. Will my daughter have to grow up in a world where the hottest thing you can have is a thigh gap? Because I'll tell you one thing. It does not matter how much you starve yourself, unless you have wide hips, you won't be able to achieve a thigh gap. Besides, if you haven't got one without the effort, why would you want one? The only positive thing I can think about with a thigh gap is that you don't get a rash between your legs from your thighs rubbing together when you're wearing a bikini, but that's about it. I mean, if you have a thigh gap naturally, then good for you, but I hardly think the rest of us should starve to get one? Personally, I don't think any of us should starve to get anything. Starving leads to eating disorders and an untreated eating disorder can, and will, kill you and that's not what you want. 

Any guy who reads my blog, can you comment, saying if you think thigh gaps are a must or not? Because I remember seeing this tweet a couple of weeks ago that said 

"Wow, look at the thigh gap on that one!
-No man ever."

And I think it had like 20.000 retweets and I can't find it now but I know it's out there, and please, guys, can you do me a favour and comment, saying what you think about thigh gaps? I would greatly apretiate it, because I don't get the whole thigh gap thing. 

Lastly, I want to specify that I'm not having a go at anyone who has a thigh gap from nature's side. If you're born with wide hips and you have a low fat percentage, then having a thigh gap is perfectly fine. What I'm trying to say is that I hope no one is starving themselves to get one. Chances are, you won't be able to. So let's just agree that we won't do that, alright? Splendid. 

Tuesday, 11 March 2014

Gifset: Health care











6 March 2014
Aasif Mandvi interviews Fox Business commentator, Todd Wilemon.


Talk about having complete lack of connection to the people you're referring to...

"To the well organised mind...

... death is but the next great adventure." -Albus Dumbledore

I wonder if the person using what sounds like an air pressure drill above my head at 8 in the morning when I have the day off, has an organised mind, because he might soon find death to be his next adventure..

Good morning!

Had to get that off my mind, can't believe they have to do that.. I wouldn't complain if it was 10am or 12pm or something, but at 8am in the morning? I'm sleeping at 8am in the morning and you better have a damned good reason to wake me up at that hour. Especially since the garbage truck made a racket outside my window as well, at 6am. I know I could close the window, but my room gets too warm... There's generally too much noise in my life. Maybe I should make a formal complaint? I might.

Nah, I'm just kidding! At least I get an early start and a lot of daylight today. Staying positive, no matter how little sleep I've had and no matter how loud the children in the nursary outside is yelling... I honestly can't wait to move out of this flat into a more quiet area. I know I sound like I'm 75 years old for saying that, but it's completely true.

Anyway! At the moment, I'm chatting to Camilla, who's at the hospital, getting her third round of chemo therapy. When she's done today, she's halfway through her treatment and we're hoping she's done and her tests look fine this summer. If they do, then Camilla, Kristine I are going on holiday to celebrate! Not that I can afford it at the moment, but damnit, if one of my best friends is finally cancer free, I'll borrow the money from mum and dad if need be.

I am, right now, the closest to broke that I've been since the end of November. I have about 150 pounds left and 175 pounds that mum ows me. I'm alright, really, I have a lot of food and no decire to eat it at the moment, so I'm good for a while. I did, however, decide that it was a good idea to empty my bank account because it's easier to manage money when you have it physically in your hand. Not a good idea. Now the funds to pay for spotify premium can't be withdrawn, so that's going to be shut down soon, and I can't buy new plugs from ebay, so when I get to 5mm, I'll have to stop until I get money.. I'm actually amazed at how quickly I've been able to stretch, I'm at 3mm at the moment, and by the end of the week I'll be moving for 3,5mm and later 4mm. I've been looking at some new plugs on ebay, and can't wait to get money again so I can buy them! Actually, what I can't wait for, is to get to 00G (8mm), there's so many cute plugs available for that size and upwards! I've got to say though, I'm anxious to know what my parents are going to say when they see that I've stretched my ear lobes. I might have a tiny faint memory of promising I wouldn't do that. Still, they haven't had any issues with any of my other piercings and has probably figured out that it's just how it's going to be for a few years and that when I feel done with my (very) late act of teen rebellionship, I'll come to my senses and take most of them out. By the way, I hope that's a relief to some of my friends as well, who have voices their concern that I'm sooner or later going to end up with implants to look like a unicorn or something like that. Don't worry, I care far too much about what people think of me to do that. Just give me a year or two to pay people to poke me with needles, and I'll give it all a rest, alright?

YAY! It sounds like the guy with the air pressure drill has taken the hint and left my life for the time being. Time to go back to sleep! Think I fell asleep at 4am this morning, and 4 hours is not nearly enough on a day off, so dream land, here I come!

Have a good day, all of you who are actually doing something productive!

Sunday, 9 March 2014

My weekend

Friday started out by waking up on my own, with no need for an alarm. Friday's lecture starts at 3, so there's every posibility of sleeping in, which is fantastic! When my drag of a lecture was finally over, I headed up to Liva's for a bit. We were supposed to go to town to do some shopping, but I couldn't be bothered, so we didn't. I then went back home to change and tidy my room, since we were doing predrinks for Sharleens birthday and just in case anyone came into my room, it needed a bit of a shine. Which was good, because the entire predrinks ended up in my room. Me, Liva, Sharleen, Rhys and Emma (one of Sharleens friends from Reading) sat in my room, drinking, playing drinking games and laughing. Rhys is one of the guys I'm living with next year and friday was the first time I saw him drunk! He doesn't really drink that much, but he was a laugh when he did!


Oh Rhys, haha! 

Me and Liva then went to Alfies when Sharleen, Emma and Rhys went to Southampton. We had a good night, but I have to say, I miss being able to get drunk! I know that sounds stupid and I know I have to look after my health, but I'm a first year uni student for fucks sake, I should be able to drink! 

Saturday, me and, you guessed it, Liva went to town to shop. We went to poundland to get some stuff that we didn't really need or could afford, and I ended up with three black storage boxes to keep makeup and skin/hair products in, making my room look a lot tidyer! Sounds silly buying stuff to decorate the flat a month and a half before I move out, but I guess it's better late than never! Liva also bought a box of the same kind as well as a pink/white polkadot shower curtain that she was more than satisfied with. You should have seen her face when she was finished putting it up! 

We then made tacos and had a two person pre drinks while getting ready before heading back into town to Alfies. I really like that place, because there's so many people (guys) there that we never get the chance of meeting when hanging out at county arms across the street from me, because that's a student pub so we basically already know everyone there. Alfies also play the most random music imaginable, everything from Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen and Wonderwall by Oasis to Circle of life from The Lion King. 

Today I haven't really been doing much. When I woke up, I watched a few episodes of Dexter, which is freaking amazing by the way, before actually being bothered to get out of bed. When I finally did start doing something productive, I realised that I lost the ball of one of my helixes at Alfies last night. I have some spare balls, but putting them back on is a struggle with capital S. Not to make things easier for myself, I also decided to change my nose stud to a ring, which wasn't really that much of a hassle, but when I was done with that, I took out the ring in my rook as well. That's always a pain to put back in and I then payed 45 minutes in front of the mirror to put another one back in. 

One arm over the head to support the ring, the other trying to put the ball back on
(or trying to take a picture, what evs).
I spent 45 minutes in this position. Got to love it! 


Nose ring! 

When I was finally done with that, I had breakfast. Mexican, actually. Norwegian mexican mix with Norwegian Jarlsberg cheese on top. Homesick? Not in the slightest. 

When I was finished, I decided to see if I could stretch my ear lobe just a little. It was 2,5mm and I have some plugs that are 3mm, so I put one in and it turned out to work fine! I then changed the pug to a 3mm eyelet, simply because I like eyelets better than plugs when they're this small. Can't wait to get to 00G, there are so many cool plugs to buy for that size! Anyway. I don't know if I've mentioned this earlier or not, but last time I stretched I ripped the earlobe. I didn't realise that the taper I was using was a 4mm and not a 3mm and without knowing it, I tried to stretch directly from 2,5mm to 4mm, and I can tell you, it HURT! It was bleeding and stuff, not good at all! I learned from it though, so from now on I'm always checking that I'm using the right size before trying to shove anything into my earlobes. I guess that is sort of self explanatory, but some of us are clearly a bit slower than the rest.. 

Right. Now I'm heading down to Cyber Italia, my second home, with Liva. She's revising finance math for her test tomorrow and I'm going to try to finish my weekly wiki on hate crime and start the Police and Police work essay which is due on the 24th. Hopefully, I'll get a lot of stuff done so that I can relax at the end of semester, but knowing myself, I don't have high hopes for it. Like my brother says, "procrastinators unite! ... Tomorrow."

Friday, 7 March 2014

Children having children

I've always wanted children. A little girl and a little boy would be perfect, but as long as they're healthy, that's of course what matters (don't panic, mum, I'm not pregnant). I have, however, always wanted my children to be born at the right time, as I'm sure most people want. But I've had different opinions of when the right time has been. When you plan these things, your future typically looks like this:

1. You've finished your education
2. You have a husband/wife
3. You have a home of your own
4. You have a stabile income to provide for your family

However, things doesn't always work out the way we want them to, as we all know, and since I became 15-16 up until now, I've thought a lot about the consept of children having children. Teen mums and dads trying to raise a child on their own, and I've had a lot of opinions on how I well I would manage if I did get pregnant at a young age.

At 15 years old, I thought having children was no problem. "I've babysat before, I could be a mum now," was the thoughts that went through my 15 year old mind. "I can do anything I set my mind to." It's a nice thought, but no, sweetie, you can't. I cannot begin to describe how glad I am that I didn't have a child at that point. The learning curve would have been so steep I would have cried myself to sleep and I would probably not even be a proper mum, as my parents would have had to do a whole lot of the work for me. 

I then turned 16. I had started on a new school and in less than a month from my birthday, I had a boyfriend. With becoming sexually active, came the pregnancy scares. We talked about it and tried to act adult about it, but as far as that went, I think he was the most adult of us. At the time I thought that he was being an irresponsible idiot for wanting to have an abortion if I became pregnant. I thought that "if you think you are old enough to have sex, you should be old enough to deal with the potential consequenses. Three years later I see how right he was. I was the irresponsible one. Keeping a child at that point would be unfair to the child. We wouldn't be able to take care of it on our own and we wouldn't be able to get the education we wanted becacuse of that. The scariest thing is that it would have been my choice, and if I had become pregnant, there's a possibility that I would have been stubborn enough to put him through the one thing he was dead scared of, just to prove to him that I was right, that we could do it. That thought has haunted me. Having a child out of misfortune and spite, instead of love. Of course, we would have loved that child, but the circumstances of how it came to be would have been dreadful. How could I think that at 16, we would handle becoming parents if we had to? 

I turned 17. About four months after my birthday, I became single. I grew up a lot that year and started to see things a bit more clearly. I understood a bit more of the burdens of having children. I still thought that I would have been able to handle it if I did become pregnant at this point. I mean, after all I was 17 years old. I saw that it wasn't easy, that it took a lot of work and money, money that I had no chance of getting hold of, but I still thought that I could have done it. I probably could have, but not in the way that I would have wanted to. 

I turned 18. Got my drivers license. I worked a lot and that was probably the point in my economical history where I would have been most likely to handle having a child. I would have had to keep living with my parents if I became pregnant at this point, but the thought of having children started to appeal to me on another level. The thought that someone would be completely dependant on me to survive and become a decent human being was endearing to me. However, there was something else that put a definite stopper to my positive thoughts. I wanted to move abroad to study. I had been single for about a year and had no plan changing that, since moving to England would mean meeting a lot of new people. And now that I had a definite plan about what I wanted to do for university, I knew that if I did get pregnant as the result of a one night stand or something, I would have to make the decision of having the pregnancy termintated. I had no issues with that, seeing as there were little to no chance that I would get pregnant. 

I moved to England and I turned 19. I'm now 19 and 5 months and I have 7 months left as a teenager. If I get pregnant now, I'll be 20 before the child is born, as long as it's not premature. But you know what? The thought that was so inviting a year ago, scares me to death at this point. The thought of someone, a small innocent child, being completely dependant on me to even survive is so frightening that there has been times lately that I have thought "do I really want to bring a child into this world someday?" Because it is a scary world. Between the government corruption, overpopulation, my own congenital heart defect that I don't know if is genetic or not, and the amount of complete and utter idiots that inhabit this world, I'm scared to put another human being onto the world and having to take care of it and take responsibility for it's actions until it turns 18 years old. I'm not sure if I want to put a child through the suffering it is to live in this world.

At some point, in 6-7 years, I will be ready, but not yet. The words do not exist that are strong enough to explain how extremely happy I am that I didn't get pregnant while my head was in the sand. If I had, I wouldn't have been where I am today. I would have been somewhere else, somewhere equally or more exciting and wonderful, but I wouldn't have the same oportunities. I would be able to watch a small, beautiful child of my own grow up to discover the world that I have come to fear just a little, but I wouldn't be able to do the same. I wouldn't be sat in my own room, in a flat that I pay for, writing this stuff to procrastinate to get out of doing an assignment that's actually quite interesting! I wouldn't be learning about how the world works from a criminological point of view and I wouldn't be able to go to class and learn about things that has fascinated me my whole life. I would be changing diapers, working a minimum wage job and living life day to day, not living abroad, doing what's going to give me the chance of getting a high end job, making me able to single handedly care for my future children. I think I'm better off as I am at the moment. 

Don't misunderstand me, I have nothing but respect for those that choose to go through with their pregnancies when they are teenagers and I think that if I would have had to, I would have embraced motherhood gladly and never looked back. I mean, since I've never had children, I don't actually know what I'm talking about, but I have a feeling that when I do have children, I will thank myself for doing it the way that I always planned. I think that when I have children and I get to experience all the things that comes with motherhood, I will thank everything that's holy that I didn't get pregnant as a teenager. I think it's brave to have children as a young adult, but these are my thoughts about my life, and I'm glad I haven't gone down that road yet, even though I'm sure I wouldn't have regret it if I had.

Just as a little side note at the end, if you've read through all this mess, first of all, I can't believe you could actually be bothered following my mess of a thought process all the way here. Second of all, I want to say that if you have read all of this, it's probably going to seem as if I do nothing but think about babies. I do. You do a lot of thinking from the age of 15 to 19, and I don't think about starting a family as much as I seem to, just so that it's been said.

Thursday, 6 March 2014

Celebrating Hollies birthday!

I've spent most of today outdoors, which was really nice for a change. It's Hollie's 21st birthday today and me, Line, Liva and Amanda wanted to do something fun with her to celebrate. We took food, sweets, cake and soda and had an outdoors picnic!

Before leaving the flat where Line and Hollie lives, we decided that we should do a flower girl theme, so we all borrowed flowery head band thingy's from Hollie and I can safely say it's the first time I've ever walked around in public with anything that even remotely resembles purple flowers on my head. It was really fun though, and here are the pictures that I know you are all just dying to see! 


When we were leaving Queens Road.



Picnic! 


Line and me.


FLOWERPOWER!


Amanda and me! Ignore my face, don't know what I was trying to pull off...


Went to a cosy little pub to have a drink or two after the picnic, which is when this picture and a lot more like it, started being taken. 


My birthday present to Hollie was a home made card with this text in it:

Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
You look like a monkey
and you smell like one too! 

I normally wouldn't write stuff like that in a birthday card, but Hollie has a great sense of humour, so I couldn't contain myself. I also gave her some piercings that I'm never going to use and that I thought would come in handy for her. They were obviously never worn and I cleaned them before putting them in zip lock bags, just felt like that should maybe be mentioned. 

Anyway. After I came home, I haven't really been up to much. I hand-knitted an infinity scarf, which was fun, and it actually turned out quite nice as well! I would post a picture, but I've gone to bed and it's way too cold to remove the covers now, so that will have to wait until tomorrow. Sorry, I know you're all dying to see what I get up to.. (by the way, I'm often quite sarcastic. Ignore comments like that). It's black, grey and dark blue and took about 45 minutes to make. I won't lie, as I was sitting there, watching the second series of House of Cards and knitting, I couldn't help but wonder if my nan would be proud if she could see me. She would knit 50 pairs of socks each year and were really good at it! I think a lot about family lately. Don't know why, but I do.

I feel like I've been calling home a lot lately as well. I do know the reason for that, though. I'm used to not seeing him that often, but I haven't seen my dad since the 2nd of January. Before that, he was home since just before chrismas, and before that I obviously hadn't seen him since I moved to England. Anyway. I think the reason why I'm calling home so often is that I know I won't see him for a long time still. When I get home for spring break in april, he's at sea. He comes home just after I go back here. I won't see him until late may/start of June. That's 6 months straight without my dad and I can easily say that's the longest I've ever gone without seeing him. It doesn't feel right at all. As I said, I'm used to not seeing him that much during a year, but 6 months straight without seeing my dad when we have as good a relationship as we do, is nothing but hard. Of course, it'll make seeing him in June that much better, and knowing myself, I'm probably going to be trailing him like a dog the first week, just because I miss him. But let's be honest, when a girl hasn't seen the superhero in her life for 6 months, is she not allowed to? I think she is. 

Just so it's been said, I'm not saying that I have it hard, not seeing my dad for 6 months. There's a lot of people who haven't even met one or even both of their parents, who have lost a parent or have a parent in the same situation as me. I'm nothing special, I'm lucky just to have two loving parents who's still together, who work well together, who takes good care of me and gives me whatever I need and want. However, it's still hard not seeing him for ages. The point I'm trying to make is that, no matter how great your life is, no matter how lucky and privileged you are, there's going to be things in your life that's hard, and it's okay to have hard times and you're allowed to miss your dad when you haven't seen him for 6 months, even though you are one of the luckiest children in the world.

Right, got that off my chest! I'm going to sleep now. I have a meeting with Student Services tomorrow and then I have a group meeting thing and then we have a lecture 12-1 and seminar groups 2-3. I think. Busy schedule, but I'm hoping I'll have the time to get some piano playing done in the middle of it all. Haven't played properly for ages and I really miss it! 

I'm probably going to have some trouble sleeping though, seeing as I just went up to 8G on my left earlobe and I have a healing conch piercing in the right ear. Might be a fun night!

Update: Woke up and realised that it wasn't the fact that I went up to 8G that made my ear hurt. It was the fact that I went too fast and managed to rip my earlobe.. Kids, don't rush when stretching!

Wednesday, 5 March 2014

A blogpost about everything.

This weekend was a hectic one. Not that it was a lot of stress or anything, but with 2500 words to write, not a lot of time to do it and no clue of how to start, it became quite hectic after all. However, its' done now and I've had today off and I have tomorrow off as well, so the plan is to sleep a lot, hang out with friends and catch up on the tv series that I watch. Granted, tv series should maybe not be a big part of my life, but it is and I don't think that's all that bad. Another thing I will be doing, is keeping myself updated on the conflict going on between Russia and Ukrain.

I obviously don't know if any of my readers have been paying attention to the Russia-Ukrain conflict, but as it has the potential of launching a critical hit to the world economy or in the worst case scenario, a situation of war, I have been keeping myself in the loop. The US and other G8 countries has made threats about sanctioning Russia, stopping the trade market between the countries if Russia doesn't admit defeat. Luckily, Russia and Ukraine has commenced political communication and the situation seems a lot more stabile now than it did yesterday. There's still a chance that it will escalate and that sanctions towards Russia will have to be launched, which will have a massive impact on the economy, driving oil prices, among other things, sky high. Hopefully, though, Moscow will have to realise that the western revolution has reached Ukrain with the downfall of Janukovich and that the majority of the Ukranian people wishes for democracy and a pro-western government, rather than the one Putin poses.

I don't know what it is about these kinds of situations, but they interest me to the moon and back! I don't think I could have ever been a politician myself, the sacrifices you have to make and the game you have to play would have been to much for me, but I like to keep my self informed and to discuss with others. After all, if you don't know what's going on in the world, how can you play a part in changing it for the better? I know that sounded remarkably similar to that of an aspiring politician, but I have no intention of entering either the Norwegian or the UK parliament. I mean, I could, if I wanted to. Probably. Maybe. However, the way that the UK parliament is run, with all the members having practically grown up together, 85% having been in class together at Oxford or Cambridge, I not only doubt that I as a foreign woman would have stood a chance of getting in, but I don't think I would have wanted to. Politics is too much ass kissing and back rubbing for my taste.

Enough politics. It's now past 2am. I should be sleeping, but I'm not. When I should be awake, I'm not. My entire sleeping pattern has been turned up side down and it's down right scary. I have a theory that the most important things I can do to protect my heart is

1. Eat healthier
2. Exersice more
3. Remeber to take the medication
4. Don't drink too much alcohol
5. Get enough sleep.

So far I've been able to do the first four, but keeping a stabile sleeping pattern is, to me, just as easy as breaking into Fort Knox.. I'm able to get up and go to lectures and stuff, I still function even though I don't get the amount of sleep I should on a regular basis and at the correct times, but getting that routine is really hard. I've been thinking of trying to put on an alarm at 10am every day, and actually force myself to not sleep any longer, maybe that would help. It would be nice to get that routine down, haven't had a proper sleeping pattern in about a year..

Right. 2.30. Maybe I should try to get some sleep. Tomorrow (today, depending on how you look at it), we're celebrating Hollie's birthday! If I have the time, I'm also going into town to et some yarn (yes mum, you heard me), I've seen this great youtube film about how to knit your own scarf, so I'm going to try that, maybe I can finally get the scarf that I've been looking for for years! But mainly, we're celebrating Hollie's birthday. I'll try to take some pictures and post them on the blog tomorrow night!

Sunday, 2 March 2014

United Blood Nation - did you know?

Cyber Italia again. Feel like I should just bring a pillow and move in here, I'm here so much lately.

I did finish the fictional story yesterday. I also changed a few major details to make it easier to write. I'm sure this isn't even remotely interesting to any of you, but after changing the gang that my main character is in, I found out some stuff about that gang that really blew my mind, so I thought I'd share it with you anyway.

The United Blood Nation, or UBN, is the east coast "branch" of the gang I was talking about yesterday, The Bloods. What really struck me about the gang was something I found out from a History Channel documentary about the bloods. Apparently, in the 90's, the gang was really taking over the gang activity on the east coast, and they became especially big in New York. They identified themselves by wearing red clothing and especially bandanas on their head and around their wrists, obviously making the job really easy for law enforcement to track down the members on the street, but that's not the point. The point is the initiation process you had to go through to become a UBN member. They have a notion that is common for most violent gangs, the idea of "blood in, blood out", usually meaning that to become a member, you have to kill someone, and the only way to get out of the gang was being killed. Once you were in, there was no turning back, essentially. Anyway, the UBN did this initiation process a little different from the typical gangs.

" 5 poppin', 6 droppin' 
Crip, kill it, or my casket drop
5 alive, 6 must die
rest in peace, the OG tie." 

If someone wanted to become part of the UBN, they had to go up to so called "neutrals", meaning a non gang affiliated person and ask "What's poppin'?" As the neutral, if your answer wasn't that little sing song rhyme, you would recieve a "buck fifty". The aspiring gang member had to cut you in the face to the point where you would have to get 150 stitches. The thought behind it was that instead of having their prospects killing a rival gang member for initiation, they would leave the UBN trademark of the buck fifty on the face of a neutral person, for ever reminding them and other members of the general public of the actions of the actions of the UBN.

When I heard this, there were chills running down my back. I mean, it's bad enough killing a rival gang member to be initiated into a life of violent crime, but that rival gang member had probably done the same at some point and would in my eyes be more "deserving" of the fate than a peaceful law abiding citizen that just didn't know enough about the gang to be aware that remembering four lines of gangster rhymes would keep them from being dismembered for life.

At some point, I might post the story I wrote on the blog, but since I haven't handed the essay in yet, I can't do it now. The university check the assignments we write against the internet to find out if the piece we've handed in is plaguarized (not sure that's how you spell plaguarized. Plagurised. Plaguariced. I don't know).

Anyway! I have 800 words left on the assignment and then I can go home! Looking forward to it already. I have lectures at 9AM tomorrow and really hope I'll be able to get a descent amount of sleep before that. 6 hours of lectures is pain when you're sleep deprived!

Update: I should probably also mention the meaning of that rhyme I was talking about. The Crips are the main rival gang of both the UBN on the east coast and The Bloods on the west coast. The Bloods and the UBN identified them selves with five pointed stars when they graffitied their gang name on the city walls. The Crips used a six point star. This is why the UBN wanted you to reply "5 poppin, 6 droppin" and "5 alive, 6 must die".